Are You Afraid Of Sex? Learn More About It

The fear of having sex is termed as genophobia. Fear is an intrinsic part of our inner self and somehow fear and sex have always been interrelated. It is important to feel relaxed and at ease before having sex. But there are hidden fears deep down our mind because sex has somehow always been categorized as some sort of a taboo. Most of the people don’t actually know that they suffer from this phobia as they never talk about it.

It is not very easy to understand the relationship between sex and fear as it has a complex and jumbled up history so to say. From the time Adam and Eve first mated to the present times, sex is associated with risk, danger and a touch of fear. Why is it so? If men and women ever have to help out each regarding this, then listening to each other and trying to understand is the key.

Fear of sex is basically fearing about something that can actually cause you no harm. It’s mostly women who fear sexual intimacy and on the other hand it is learnt that a large chunk of men fear emotional intimacy. It is amusing and at the same time sad that we often fear the most intimate aspects of life, i.e. love and sexuality.

However modern, sophisticated and dignified we think we are, there is some part of our conscience which is driven by sex. In most of the cultures, sex has been portrayed in a negative light. Probably that’s the reason why so many people feel shy talking about sex.

So why do we fear sex? This could happen for many reasons including an extremely religious upbringing, childhood abuse, parents having problems regarding sex etc.

Our upbringing has got a lot to do with our attitude towards sex. The fear of having sex is somewhere deep rooted in the values that we have been taught as a child. If you have always been told not to talk about sex and that it is something bad, then it is bound to get embedded in your mind and will hold true for you throughout your life. Withholding of accurate information about sex is a very big influence in shaping childhood sexual development.

Women mostly fear rape, physical or mental torture forced upon them by men. They basically fear oppression. On the other hand, men fear if what the woman is same from inside as she is portraying herself on the outer side.
The symptoms of fear of having sex include breathlessness, excessive sweating, nausea, dry mouth, shaking, heart palpitations, inability to speak or think clearly, a fear of dying, a sensation of detachment from reality or an anxiety attack.

Even in the strongest of relationships, fear and sex are very closely linked. Even when your love bond is very strong and sex life is great, you still fear that either your partner will leave you or he will die. This fear can make you unnecessarily possessive.

There are many ways through which a couple can harmlessly lose their fear of sex. What we actually need to do is, educate ourselves about our body and sexuality. One must read books, search online, attend group discussions etc to truly understand it all.

It’s very crucial to understand that where are the feelings of fear coming from? You need to find the origin and then deal with them accordingly. Go to a good therapist who can counsel you regarding the same.

There are many other treatment options available:

1.Hypnotherapy: It helps to remould the thoughts in our subconscious mind that might be the reason for the fear. By doing this, the symptoms of fear of sex are minimized. This therapy is safe and also shows results at a much faster rate as compared to other treatment options.

2.Energy Psychology: This therapy has its roots in acupuncture. But the difference here is that no needles are used. It is basically emotional acupuncture which helps in changing the patterns of our thoughts and behavior. These techniques can help you throughout your life in all the situations.

3.Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP): Using this therapy the fear of sex is minimized by re-programming our experiences that have actually created the phobia. In this way the fear of sex is lessened. This method is very quick and effective.

Hiding your fear wont help in any which way. So it is advisable to talk to your partner at length on this or consult your physician. Getting rid of your fears can help you in engaging in a normal and healthy sex life.