Is Yours a High Need Baby?

But when these needs, specially those of being carried and held all the time, to prevent the tear machine from starting, get more than those of what average babies demonstrate; you have on hands – a high need baby!

Often it is difficult for people to understand what a high needs baby is until actually shown one, categorically using the term for it. Even mothers of such children keep suffering, without actually understanding the real situation. With fears of their child being abnormal, fussy, spoiled, difficult and even underdeveloped, haunting their thoughts, mothers keep groping in the dark, with acquaintances further aggravating the agony without really knowing what’s going on.

Many babies have an above average need for being held, carried, soothed. They have an above average need for attention from the mother specially, which often results in her ending up carrying them or giving them some kind of motion all the time, merely to prevent them from crying, else, believe it or not they would continue crying the whole day.

Such never happy or content babies are whom we call the “High-Needs babies”.

Identifying a high needs baby

A high needs baby is one you can not miss only that very few people know the term to use. Often you’ll come across a little champ, who simply refuses to fall to sleep, each time managing to stay awake more than you yourself can, with excessive and non stop crying, which is almost deafening to the ears, a high needs baby is difficult to soothe, quite unpredictable, demanding, and a difficult eater.

The mother of such a child seldom finds rest as the baby demands to be carried or moved all the time, clinging to her for attention and is never entertaining himself/herself. With such babies there is nothing like eating easily and then falling off to sleep. Not only that you drop a pin and there, the little one is all up and crying again, much to the dismay of the mother.

Familiar surroundings, and lots of high energy activity and stimuli keep there babies entertained, but then again, the same trick which works once is not guaranteed to work again with them.

It is seen that almost all babies show these kind of symptoms and traits off and on. But high need babies, show these traits, on and on. So something which is ‘occasional’ with other babies is ‘constant’ with high need babies.

Reasons why a baby is a high needs baby

The tendency of being a high need baby is neither genetic nor acquired. Mostly babies are in some sort of a discomfort or pain which initially triggers this kind of behavior, ultimately becoming a habit with them.

Infants often have colic pains, allergies, acid reflux, stomach pains or some psychological fears etc. this results in the child getting cranky and makes him scream and cry aloud making all efforts to soothe the child useless. This is from where the behavioral patterns are formed.

But although it is unimaginable for parents going through the bringing up of such babies, it is finally been proved by research that infants and babies grow out of being high need individuals, to slowly catapult into calmer toddlers, who begin playing on their own, their appetites increase and they finally start to venture away from the parents, the curiosity to explore taking over their urges to cling.

Tips to cope up with a high needs baby

The key word in dealing with such toddlers is ‘patience’ and ‘only patience’. And now that we know that this is a temporary phase it will soon pass like water under a bridge.

So the best is to first identify the problem and accept it. Acceptance of the fact that your baby is temperamentally different from other babies and is not exactly what you had expected makes things easier.

Try out innovative ways of keeping the baby occupied, taking him for a walk in the stroller being the best option.

For a while, a few months, worry less about an untidy house, punctuality and meeting deadlines. You already have your hands full, so be easy on yourself. Take a break once in a while you deserve it.

Ask for a baby sitter to help you off and on.

But remember always that this is a passing phase and you and your baby will finally grow out of it and enter the world of normalcy. Till then – all the best!